Women Jokes
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A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his blond female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it then slammed it shut and stormed back in the house. A little later she went to the mailbox and again opened it, slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went.

As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again, marched to the mailbox, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever. Puzzled by her actions the man asked her,

"Is something wrong?"

To which she replied, "There certainly is!" . . . My stupid computer keeps saying, "YOU'VE GOT MAIL."

Here is something to ponder about:
An English professor wrote these words on the blackboard,
 directing his students to punctuate it correctly.
"Woman without her man is nothing."
The men wrote: "Woman, without her man, is nothing."
 The women wrote: "Woman! Without her, man is nothing."

There are several men in the locker room of a private club after exercising.

Suddenly a cell phone that was on one of the benches rings. A man picks it up
and the following conversation ensues:

* Hello?
* Honey, It's me.
* Sugar!
* Are you at the club?
* Yes.
* Great! I am at the mall 2 blocks from where you are. I saw a beautiful mink coat ... It is absolutely gorgeous!! Can I buy it?
* What's the price?
* Only $ 1,500.00
* Well, OK, go ahead and get it, if you like it that much ...
* Ahhh and I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the 2001 models. I saw one I really liked. I spoke with the salesman and he gave me a really good price ... and since we need to exchange the BMW that we bought last year...
* What price did he quote you?
* Only $ 96,000 ...
* OK, but for that price I want it with all the options.
* Great! Before we hang up, something else ...
* What?
* It might look like a lot, but I was reconciling your bank account and ...I stopped by the real estate agent this morning and I saw the house we had  looked at last year ... It's on sale!! Remember? The one with a pool, English Garden, acre of park area, beachfront property ...

* How much are they asking?
* Only $ 450,000 ... a magnificent price, and I see that we have that much in
  the bank to cover ...
* Well, than go ahead and buy it, but just bid $ 420,000. OK?
* OK, sweetie ... Thanks! I'll see you later!! I love you!!!
* Bye ... I do, too ...

The man hangs up, closes the phone's flap and raises his hand while holding
the phone and asks to all those present: "Does anyone know who this phone
belongs to?"